Closet Extremist

De Plane Bosth! De Plane…I see, Tattoo.

Much as I hate to admit it, I dislike tattoos on the ladies. (Oh! So you like them on men right? Shut up Harvey, you know what I’m talking about.)

I know that they’re all the rage, and it is completely impossible to be “Hip”, “With it”, or “Rad” without them, but I just don’t find them attractive. A little tattoo in a discrete place doesn’t bother me all that much, but some folks just can’t resist getting the whole “Ride to Live / Live to Ride” logo (with the eagle and everything) across their back and down both arms. It’s a little much, is all I’m trying to say.

So there is this coworker of mine, who works in the HBA department, (That’s Health and Beauty Aids for those of you deficient in your retail jargon) who has recently gotten herself a shiny new piece of body art. She’s reeeal proud of it too! She likes to show it off in the back room, essentially to anyone who asks her about it. The problem here is the placement of the aforementioned masterpiece, right across the upper part of her (ahem) backside. I witnessed her showing it to another coworker today, and she just about pulled her pants completely down to make sure he got the full effect. I heard from another coworker, that she has been witnessed pulling her skirt up in order to show it to some other fellows. I’m not saying that this girl is stupid, but whenever I think of these types of actions the term “slower than smoke off shit” spring invariably to mind.

It’s unfortunate, but my gut reaction to anyone with a tattoo like the one described above, is the same as the one I have toward that young lady…a mixture of pity and contempt. I’m trying to get myself past those opinions, but it’s a hard row for me to hoe.

(Heh, I said Hoe)