Closet Extremist

Another Bad Habit

(No Harvey, not a Nun with a bullwhip) Ahem...

Like I was saying before I rudely interrupted myself, I've got all sorts of bad habits, and the one that I recently thought of is terribly irritating due to its destructive nature.

So I've had the same pair of sunglasses for about 2 years now. Ten bucks is all I paid for them, and they were still going strong. If you're anything like me, you've probably realized that the fastest way to destroy a pair of shades is to purchase a hunnertnfiddy dollar pair of Gargoyles, so I keep it cheap, and normally keep them forever.

Okay, due to my job, I have to go in and out of doors at least a billion and six times a day, so there's a whole lot of "shades on...shades off." ( /Mr. Miyagi ) What to do with them when they ain't on my face? Shirt pocket? Nope, pack of smokes and three pens. Smock pocket? Nuh uh, grab a hold of that grill in its box, pull to chest, crunch. Put 'em up on your head? Ball Cap! Duh. I know! Hang them from one earpiece out of your back pocket. Yes Daniel San, now go sand the floor or something, you're starting to bother me.

Now you all can see what kind of incidences a body could run into while the "visors" are hanging from your butt. Normally I don't have any problems with the "Gee, I sat on my sunglasses" scenario, due to the fact that I rarely get a chance to sit down. Meanwhile, 2 new pairs of sunglasses later.

However, it's impossible for me to stop this continued carnage against my cheap shades. If the doctor's can isolate the gene that makes me put 'em in my back pocket, there may be hope for future generations, but until then, I guess I'll just keep the sunglass maker's in business.

Posted by Johnny - Oh at April 27, 2004 08:56 PM