July 22, 2004

There are trailers in my past.

After linking to Sally yesterday, she went and gave me a reason to link to her again today. Make sure you click the "Move" link. It's frickin' hilarious. It also triggered a memory or two.

(Let's get on to the back-story, shall we?) I was adopted by my Dad when I was four or so. Mom got divorced, and got back together with her high-school sweetheart. They got married, and my Dad took my brother, sister, and I as his own. (Stay with me, I'm going somewhere with this.) As was growing up, we would periodically head up to New York (That's upstate, not the City.) from Tennessee to see the extended family. These sojourns would normally include a visit with my eldest brother (who stayed up north with the guy who sired me) at TGWSM's trailer. (See? I told you it was going somewhere.)

Now this place deserved to be on that "Trailer Trash" site. At any given time, there were at least four cars "parked" out front. One of which actually ran and drove. The rest were just strewn about in a way reminiscent of a three year old's toy cars after he's been put down for his nap. Scattered among the piles of "Detroit Detritus" were various and sundry household appliances, the odd fifty gallon drum, and periodic patches of three foot high grass.

The domicile itself was no better than the rest of the place. From what I was told, when they were bringing the trailer in to be placed on the lot, the only thing they had to drag it down the hill to where it was to be placed was an old bulldozer. Things went well until they discovered that there wasn't enough room to actually tow the trailer all the way to its final resting place, so someone had the great idea of just pushing the abode from the side. As you might guess, mobile homes are not designed to take that sort of stress, so the thing broke in half. (You could hardly see the patch job though. Nobody notices four by eight sheets of plywood painted with tar. Sure man, looks good.)

After a few years, he built a covered porch for it, that really wouldn't have been too bad if he'd used any sort of pressure treated wood during the construction. The winter's in New York are a real bitch-kitty, so this poor wooden edifice began to twist itself into all sorts of interesting shapes. Add to that the fact that there were two or three refrigerators stored there weighing things down, and this poor porch just wasn't looking too good. Did I mention that the fridges had beer taps drilled into the fronts of them? (Really puts the "Ass" in "Classy" dunnit?)

I can't imagine why I preferred to stay with my Mom and Dad?

Posted by Johnny - Oh at July 22, 2004 09:46 PM
Comments

Oh My Goodness. I can actually relate (sort of).

Spent many many weeks in a little town called Hazard Ky (yes, it's real - I've been there). I kept expecting to see examples from there in that Movin' website - maybe I should submit some.

BTW - sounds like you made a very wise decision!

Posted by: Tammi at July 22, 2004 10:26 PM

Quite a picture you've painted. I was waiting to hear that you ran into a strange looking dude playing the banjo.

But hey, they're Hillary's "peeps" too!

Great story.

Posted by: Jim at July 23, 2004 04:28 AM

Tammi: I've actually been to Hazard, KY as well. I'm very tickled that I didn't have to spends weeks there, though. :)

Jim: Hmmn. No Banjo's, but "The man who sired me" and my brother both played guitar. Does that count? :)

Posted by: Johnny - Oh at July 23, 2004 06:49 AM

you forgot that our sire's sire played the banjo & the fiddle. The pic's with all the cars really brought the memories back. And I was glad you remembered the fridges w/beer taps. Just couldn't resist on this one, I had to comment as how clearly you pictured with words the wonderful surrounding & living quarters we used to visit.

Posted by: ME at July 23, 2004 11:51 AM

Johnny-Oh: Glad to see you've improved your standards over the years.

Now if only I could get you to stop wasting time with that ne'er-do-well Straight White Eric. He's SUCH a bad influence...

Posted by: Harvey at July 23, 2004 01:18 PM

That was great! If in doubt, link Sally! ;)

Posted by: Sally at July 23, 2004 03:26 PM

Wow! I pictured that all perfectly. The only thing you were missing, in my mind, were the hounddogs sleeping on the porch. I've seen what you're describing more times than I care to admit too! Good for your Mom in finding a great guy to raise you.

Posted by: Boudicca at July 23, 2004 04:30 PM

Hey Wow! ME- there is my actual "blogless" sister. Nice to see you commenting 'Chelle. :^) I'd forgotten that Grandpa "H" played the banjo. Probably a surpressed memory or something. ;^)

Okay Harvey. I'll quit hanging out with Eric, as long as you: move to within an hour's drive from me, get a pool table for your garage, and have a whole bunch of interesting people out there once a week to shoot pool and imbibe heavily. Deal?

Sally: Hey. It worked this time, so there's no reason it wouldn't work in the future. Thanks for the inspiration. :^)

Boudicca: There was generally a Dog or three running around there, but I don't recall if any of them were hounds. Definately nothing of the "blue tick" variety at least.

My Mom certainly did a good job catching my Dad. The only thing that I regret is that my Dad is the spitting image of his Dad,( Irish, red hair when younger, went mostly bald later, and the hair turned blonde, blue eyes, fair complection, and all that) and I look nothing like him ('slovakian, dark hair, dark eyes, tan well, taller, etc). I'd love it if I had the chance to carry on the tradition of looking like my Dad. Alas, it didn't work out that way, but I'm still glad he's my Dad. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Posted by: Johnny - Oh at July 23, 2004 05:52 PM

Finally got round to reading that trailer trash site in it's entirety. I posted the quiz at my place. The first question remains my favourite! :)

Posted by: Sally at July 24, 2004 07:41 AM

Johnny-Oh - I *am* within an hour's drive. You just need to go REALLY fast :-)

Posted by: Harvey at July 25, 2004 01:10 AM
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