July 20, 2004

The Little Things

So I had yesterday off from work, and had to get a few chores done around the house, and run a bunch of errands, and the next thing I know it's 11:00 PM and I need to get some sleep. Sigh. Not enough hours in the day, it seems, but that's not what I'm here to talk about.

After I got a haircut, I had to stop and fill up the mini-van with gas, and while at lunch, someone had mentioned mowing the lawn, so I figured I'd go ahead and put some gas for the mower into this little 1 gallon gas can that I've been carrying around for years. Got back to the house, changed into my boots, ditched the shirt, and commenced to mow the lawn.

After I'd completed the side and front yards, I decided that I would go ahead and top up the tank before moving on to the back yard. As I was reaching down to pick up my little 1 gallon gas can, it struck me.

I'll always remember the day I bought that little gas can. At the time I was working a ten to seven shift at a call center, and I was on my way to work. After turning on the radio (News and Talk, that's pretty much all I listen to) I was so captivated by what I was hearing, that instead of watching the gas guage, I wound up running out of fuel roughly a mile from where I worked. I was able to call up my colleague and roommate to come and get me, and take me down the road to the nearest filling station. That's when I purchased the little gas can, and a gallon of fuel to get me on to work.

The date was September 11, 2001.

I recall my buddy telling me that they had decided to close the call center due to the fact that it was located in Oak Ridge, TN, and nobody knew what might happen (What with all the nuclear-oriented things that go on around there.). We came on home and watched in stunned disbelief the rest of the events that we all know so well.

I've got this huge American flag on my living room wall. I've got a print of the "Towers of Light" memorial on the adjacent wall. Neither one have as much impact on me as that little gas can.

Just goes to show that even if I wanted to forget, there's no way I'll ever be able to. Or forgive.

Posted by Johnny - Oh at July 20, 2004 05:41 PM

You *do* realize that I'm going to remember this every time I look at my *own* gas can now, right? :-/

Posted by: Harvey at July 20, 2004 06:24 PM

I have the same "flash" when I see the fighter jets out of McDill. I've never heard as many as I did that day, and I've never forgotten that feeling when I hear them now.

Posted by: Tammi at July 20, 2004 09:48 PM

Yeah guys. It was just a "Gut reaction". All of the things I felt on that day just came flooding in at once. I'm here to tell you that it messed me up pretty badly. But when you physically stumble from "just a thought' that you've had, you know it has affected you more than just "deeply".

Goddamnit. The "Lump in my throut" is back. I thought I had purged it for tonight, but apparentl;y not.

I hope it's not a "long" one, but it's liable to be.

Posted by: Johnny - Oh at July 20, 2004 10:21 PM

Just a gas can ... but it's powerful stuff.

Posted by: That 1 Guy at July 21, 2004 02:26 AM
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