Closet Extremist

...to the Oldies

I know that I've talked about this subject one time before, but I don't think that I got through just how serious this problem is. Today at work, it wasn't too bad. Despite the fact that I was stuck out on the greenhouse patio assembling grills all day, I had a fan on me, so it didn't get too crazy. (A note about the greenhouse patio: it gets a minimum of 15 degrees warmer in there when the sun shines on it. It hit 105 degrees fahrenheit in there, not counting the humidity.)

When I got home this afternoon, I took one look at the lawn, decided that it was it or me, and broke out the mower. This was at quarter after four this evenng, AKA the hottest friggin' part of the day. Have I mentioned that all we have is a "person powered" lawn cutting device? If not, well I have now. Let's recap: just got off of work, lawn needs mowing, push mower, heat indexes in the high 90's. What's this a recipe for? Sweat.

I shucked my shirt before I even got started, so I just had on my work shorts, boots, and a ball cap. After I ran through one full tank of gas in the mower (front yard, both side yards, and about a third of the back.) I decided that it was time to take a break and get some fluids into me. (Side note: as I'm sitting here writing this (9:34 PM), I just got a leg cramp. You know you're dehydrated when you get a cramp from blogging.) The roommate's daughter immediately commented, "Geez, you're sweaty!"

Since I had my shirt off, there was nothing there to catch and hold all the moisture coming outta my bod, so it just rolled down to my shorts. There was a 6 inch band of wetness starting at the waist, and going downward. Every piece of exposed skin had a sheen of liquid on it. Socks and hat both soaked. But here's the kicker. Have you ever noticed that when you stay in the lake/pool, or shower/bath too long, that you will start turning into a prune? Of course you have. Everyone has noticed the tips of your fingers getting all crinkly from the moisture. Well this was me today.

Friends. If you ever needed a litmus test to figure out if you are a bona-fide sweat hog, this is it. If you get "raisin fingers" from mowing the damn lawn, you're one.